Friday, December 29, 2006

Family. Family. And more family.

I love all the Christmas things that go on here. I think that every night this week we've had some form of family round, or been to someone's house. I am so fortunate that almost all of my extended family live in Harrogate and especially over Christmas we make a big deal of getting together as much as we can.

When we're together we generally eat and drink and eat and drink some more. And then drink some more and eat some more. Maybe go for a walk inbetween to work up an appitite for dinner! And I love it. Every minute of it.

But with such a close knit family, it has made it so much harder to bare now that there's a crack in it. It is so painful that we are not all together anymore. We're not an even number now. And there are so many wounds that show no signs of healing. Everything that's gone on this year with my family has been so much more pronounced at Christmas and the pain just keeps going on and on. It seems so unfair.

Even though it doesn't affect me directly, the whole thing is hurting us all. And I, as always, wish there was something I could do to fix things. I hate it that most of the problems around me don't have a 'quick fix' solution. Either the answer is long and drawn out and takes alot of time and paitence, or I don't even have a clue where to begin looking for an answer.

Life is so complicated. I wish I were 8 years old again. Then the most complicated thing in my life was whether to wear my blue skirt or my red skirt for dinner at Grandma's.
Time and patience. Two things I am very much lacking.

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