Berlin Baby!

Well well well. I'm still here! It's been a long time since I posted anything, but that's because life in Kat-world has been crazy busy for the last two weeks. Let me start at the beginning. After all, it is a very good place to start.

After exams finished, we went off to Berlin with the chapel choir and MMV (Mary's Mixed Voices) for 4 days. I have to admit, I wasn't massively excited about going. Exams had literally just ended and I really wanted to not do very much and 'recuperate'! But I had an amazing time. It was all so so much fun. Relaxed and chilled out, but hard work at the same time because we didn't really stop the whole time we were there! The hotel was lovely and really funny because each floor had a different transport theme. Ours was cars I think and all the walls were painted with cars. The other levels were the same with an airplane, a boat, motorbikes etc. And then the stairwells had all kinds of random things like a little propeler on the airplane floor, and some of those lovely old-fashioned suitcases. Breakfast was proper German-style, ham and cheese and bread. Which I loved on the first day, but then I just wanted my toast and cornflakes back!

We sang on two evenings. The first was a joint concert of the two choirs in a beautiful and modern church that was built next to the old one which got half blown apart in the war and was never rebuilt. It was a strange sight to see half a spire rising up with the big octagonal tower of the new church next to it. Inside it was stunning because all the windows were little blue squares so there was a beautiful blue-hued atmosphere. We also sang and evensong and mass in another church with chapel choir. That was incredible! I feel so privilaged to have been able to sing in such wonderful accoustics, the sounds just hung in the air after we finished.

We also did plenty of sightseeing, got the know the underground pretty well, and just generally had fun. We generally stuck together: Tom, Ben, Andy, Matt, Rachael, Helen and myself and we had such a laugh! Tom and I were named dad and mum of the group because we took charge of the map! Ben of course was the annoying 7 year old kid who won't stay still! Here's a photo of our 'family':

So much fun. Helen was crazy aunt, Andy the 14 year old geek and Rachael the quiet 10 year old. Although it did get a little wierd being referred to as mum!

Anyway, that was pretty much Berlin, I would love to go into it more, but it's probably not that interesting for other people! For me it was a wonderful thing to end the year with. We laughed and talked and messed around and I don't remember the last time I had that much fun! I think also the fact that we were there for a purpose: to sing, made a difference. It was like there was something more holding us together than just friends on a holiday. We had a purpose. We even sang on the tube and got a clap from one woman! We sang Lonesome Road. A beautiful song that will forever remind me of Mary's choirs.

So, that was Berlin. Then last week, instead of having time to recover from that... I went off to Cumbria with the Christian Union. Again, I wasn't massively enthused about going because I just wanted to brood over the fact that I wasn't in Berlin any more! But again it turned out to be so much fun. We went with Hildbede who are a fastastic group of people and even though it rained none-stop, we had a great time. There weren't many of us either so it was really nice to get to know everyone and just generally relax and chill out. Olly, the guy who was speaking for us is an amazing guy, I learnt alot from him and he is so funny! I spent one entire lunch time just laughing and having no idea why!

It was very strange to be back at Knock though. My very first ever houseparty was at Knock with Aidans in my first term of first year. There is alot about it that I don't remember because it was so early on and I forgot so much about first term, I guess because it was all new and strange. But being back brought back so many memories and it scares me that it was all only about 18 months ago. It feels like there should be about 4 years since then. So much has happened and so much has changed in such a short space of time and it really scares me. It all links in with my feelings of terror at everything changing at the end of this year. So many of my friends are graduating this time, I'm going away for a year and when I get back most of my friends here will have graduated too.

I know that I will see people again, it's not that that scares me. It's just how everything changes now. Nothing will ever be like this again and I hate that. In one week's time I will move out of Greencroft. For ever. Yesterday we sang our last service with the choir. For ever. (It was in the cathedral though which was fitting, and beautiful) I have said goodbye to some people. For ever. I don't want to move on and change and have to make new friends and face new things. I want to stay here like this. For ever!

I know that these are rediculous things to say and that life is all about change. I also know that there are some things in my life that I can rely on being there for longer and I know that above all I can trust that God will be there for me. For ever. Having that knowledge, that no matter what happens to me, or what changes I have to go though, that God is always with me and always guiding me gives me so muc comfort. It just makes me wonder how much more petrified I would be of the future if I didn't have that.

And now that's just about the end of all my news. I hope it wasn't too boring! There is only one more week here and I hope I can make the best of it. And brace myself for the saying goodbye part.

x